February 13, 2009

STRESSED

Yes, the timestamp on this entry is correct. I've developed a terrible new habit: I wake up every night around 4 AM to fret. I have been awake for an hour now, so stressed out that I don't know whether to cry or throw up.

My husband leaves for SERE school on Monday. A few days later, I will find out whether I am pregnant. If I am, I won't be able to tell him for two and a half weeks. But the more likely scenario, obviously, is that I am not, in which case I will have to do the next fertility round by myself a day or two before he gets home. Thus, I will have to pick up my husband from SERE and drive him straight home for babymaking. The thought of forcing the situation the day he finishes being beaten and starved makes me sick to my stomach...but so does the thought of skipping a cycle when we have precious few left.

So I lie in bed fretting and stressing every single night. I'm back at the Choose Your Own Adventure stage.

Posted by Sarah at February 13, 2009 04:49 AM | TrackBack
Comments

Of course the thought of babymaking may help your husband get through SERE school.

My ‘glass half full’ ‘not in your shoes’ two cents.

Good luck…to both of you.

Posted by: tim at February 13, 2009 09:01 AM

Well, if he's been beaten and starved, might I suggest you begin the evening with a lovely meal of some his favorites, followed by a hot shower & massage THEN get to the business (whether for babymaking or not)? Of course, if I were in your shoes, I'd do the biznasty first and follow-up with the other two because Brian would be ASLEEP at the end of the massage. LOL

Maybe the next time you're awake at 4:00, you can make a mental list of all the things you need to shop for? Or, just call me & we can chat it up. :)

Posted by: Guard Wife at February 13, 2009 10:10 AM

*hugs*, Sarah.

Posted by: Leofwende at February 13, 2009 11:38 AM

Eat a banana, drink some milk and go back to bed. It works!

Posted by: Oda Mae at February 13, 2009 03:29 PM

Ugh! I'm sorry. Wish I could say something better than that.

Posted by: Lucy at February 13, 2009 08:44 PM

I have nothing but hugs, love and prayers for ya.

Posted by: Reasa at February 14, 2009 11:12 AM